* HIC *

I was so bugged today that I made one more Appu...

Peace Vs Piece

Till now I was always under the impression that I have tremendous patience. I also assumed that I did not lose my temper easily. Ya, few episodes of irritation occure but that is all. But now it seems that someone(who so ever that is...God/Humans/Aliens/Supernatural Powers/My Fate/etc) has taken up this challenge to prove me wrong...to make sure that I lose...that I accept that my assumptions were/are wrong...UGHHH...Yeh toh meri teesari aankh khulwake hi dum lega!

Life's full of ups and down....suna toh tha...dint know that there were twists and turns as well with the dead ends and sometimes a cross junction. I am so SICK and EXASPERATED of the things that are happening to me cause they just refuse to leave me alone. I WANT TO BE ALONE.....and at peace!!!

Come on Man! I cant be the chosen one, can I? Perhaps I am already! I am a person who always followed a simple policy of,'Live and Let Live!' but the stuff that revolves around me does the exact opposite...to me! 'Hum toh jeeyenge bhaiiya... par tumko nahi jeene denge!" GRRRRRRRR......

I feel like holding a bat(not the flying mammal) in my hand and smashing everybody's butt who so ever comes in my way to messup with me. I know I sound violent and thats exactly NOT what I am but like I mentioned at the beginning, there is something who doesnot want me to be the way I am...Simple...Patient...and a Genuine Person!! Yes and said GENUINE!!!

So now what??? I dont know what to do? Should I surrender and say, "aao aur meri bajaake jaao" or should I rebel like I have always and achieved nothing" If Life's a test then I have done my PHD's...AB Bas... I dont want to give any more exams...and even if I am left with no choice then atleast let that test be of my stream. 'Hindi ki jagah Maths ka paper solve karna is a big time trauma!'

I dont feel like speaking with anyone right now and thats the reason I am writing my feelings out. My fingers are doing the talking. Its not that I will take out my anger on people but its just that I want to be alone. I dont want sympathies and allegations. I dont want to please or impress anyone. I dont want to adjust for anyone now. I dont want to be understanding anymore. I dont want to meet anyone. I feel like diving into a lake(...okay I am not thinking of commiting suicide!) Cmon!!! I am not a loser! I just need peace. Need to get into a different medium of life where I can hear noone..see noone...speak with noone...(temporarily)

I surely dont want to turn into a monk...never had any ferrari! Okay now thats a bad one!